The turbulence was so bad that the seat belt light remained on for the duration of the six hour flight from SFO to JFK. Any moment now the pilot will speak on the intercom and assure us we’ve hit a bumpy patch, that he’d work on smoothing it out. That message never came. Oh please God, I don’t want to die in flight. Anywhere preferably in my sleep or in a rocking chair or at the library, but I don’t want to spiral head-first sitting in the middle aisle with my unborn child.

After a sleepless red-eye flight, I checked my pee for pregnancy. It’s a simple test. One line means not pregnant. Two lines mean pregnant. One line, only one line, still only one line, three minutes, five minutes pass. Well there goes two wasted weeks of sobriety. I thought I’d be pleased either way, but honestly, I’m more disappointed than I thought I’d be.

While I pray often, I rarely ask God to grant me a wish. Recently, however, I’ve been praying specifically to get pregnant. I did a novena which is 9 days of guided prayer in request for something. Last time I did a novena was in business school when I asked God to help me get an internship. That was 10 years ago. The last part of the novena I prayed read, “If what I ask is not for my own good and the good of others, grant me what is best, that I may build up your kingdom of love in our world.” I’ve always believed in God’s plan for me which has been a beautiful plan thus far, so I will sit tight and be grateful for what I have in this moment. Not for what the future holds, but to treasure the abundance that I currently have.

I have been up, out and about for more than 36 hours straight without rest. Sweet dreams to me.

I sweat when I sleep. Deep damp sleep. I feel freakish waking up in a wet state. Always been a heavy sweater. Even when I’m eating, I’ll sweat profusely over spiced meals. I like my food jalapeno hot so it’s always this weird dichotomy of food enjoyment and brow-sweating embarrassment. I haven’t been getting much sleep lately. I get it in little bursts. I’m the last to fall asleep and first to wake.

It has been a taxing two weeks post-insemination. I feel pregnant. I’m bloated, sober, fatter, crampy. I’m exhibiting all the PMS signs that I never get even when I do eventually get my period. The horror of my teenage years, also known as severe acne, has returned with pimples sprouting around my back and dotting the hairline around my face. Without birth control, my hormones are out of whack and causing skin eruptions!

These two weeks of sobriety have been the kiss of death for a wine-guzzler like me. Wine was my late night dessert substitute. Without it, I’ve reverted to snacking or going to bed starving. Not fun. Marc tells this great story of a friend who went on a diet. He claimed, “I went on a diet for 10 days and I lost…10 days.” That statement resonates so well with me. I feel like I’ve lost out on two weeks of life. A full life is one where all your senses are engaged: physical warmth, emotional connection, achievement, laughter, good books, movies, music, food, and good wine!

Yesterday I opened up a bill from Kaiser and almost started crying. Amount You Owe $476.70.  Please Pay This Amount. I haven’t even birthed a child. That cost breaks down to 16 lab items, 1 specialty office visit, and 1 ultrasound. This is after my co-pays. This is after I find out my insurance doesn’t cover the herbs I’ve been taking with the acupuncturist. I am a healthy woman trying to get pregnant. The year is not even half over and I’ve already used up my flexible spending account dollars. I work for a generous corporate employer. And still, I have to pay ridiculous sums out of pocket. I am a well-paid professional, working for a generous corporate employer. Yet this bill brings tears to my eyes. Can you imagine a single mother or an unmarried woman getting paid minimum wage who wants to have a child? This country sucks. I want to go live in Canada! I don’t know how people do it. What if you don’t have insurance and someone calls an ambulance for you because you’re having a heart attack in the middle of Union Square? What American can afford health care? It is ludicrous.

On a happy note, I am heading to my other favorite city on a red-eye, arriving in NYC at 7am. Virgin America. Wooohooo! I’m not bringing my personal laptop, only my work computer, which means I can’t post any pics. No I do not have an iPhone, unfortunately. Seems a bit redundant and excessive to have a Blackberry and an iPhone. That means, tons of pictures to post when I return after Memorial Day. 10 full days in beautiful, sunny, chaotic, vibrant New York. Hello Big Apple.

I finished this book a while ago, but quickly forgot about it. I never really got into it. Maybe because I couldn’t relate to the characters. Maybe because I thought the writing was mediocre. Here is my biggest gripe about the writing. Cormac McCarthy limits his use of character names. He’s constantly using pronouns (i.e., ‘he,’ ‘I’). He’ll do this for pages and pages until you’re scratching your head, wait, who is he talking about?! How hard is it to reference your characters’ names every other paragraph or so. The ambiguity was maddening.

I believe I had read this book before. Starting out, it felt like new material. Towards the middle, I distinctly started recalling passages. At least it was a quick read. Can’t say I recommend it. The movie with Javier Bardem did a great job of capturing the essence of the book. Given I didn’t really like the book, I’d advise sticking with the movie.

A couple weeks ago, a post on my Facebook feed said that my mom was reading porn. RED FLAG! I called her immediately and said that her account had been compromised. I asked for the passwords for both my parents’ accounts and went to work.

Anyone who has a Facebook account or if you care about your parents who aren’t tech-savvy, I urge you to take control or coach them through the following steps.

I’m always so surprised to see accounts compromised time and time again. Take action, people!

Steps to make your Facebook account secure:

Go to account settings.

Click on security settings.

- Enable secure browsing.

- Enable text message notifications.

- Require login approvals.

Simple easy steps to avoid havoc.

Highlights from our full day hiking experience at Point Lobos. See if you can spot the sea lions sunbathing.

I have a multitude of credit cards because of the various points offered.

3 points / $1 spent on Amazon.com

1.5 points / $1 spent on Capital One

I also have Chase and Bank of America credit cards that have special point systems for a duration of time. As a result, I put a sticker on each of my cards that indicates what the point system is.

Chase: 3% on flights, hotels, and rental cars through 5/31/12.

Bank of America card: 5% on gas, groceries, drug stores, and restaurants through 6/30/12.

Every person who collects my card takes a double-look, then gives a quizzical “wuh?” face.

Haha! Yeah, I’m a point freak.

I have been itching to spend time in nature. Unfortunately Dean doesn’t like camping, which is a travesty, but boutique hotels are convenient and easy too. We went down to Monterey and Carmel this past weekend. I’ve always loved the Monterey, Carmel, Big Sur area. If only it were closer! We live in such a beautiful place. I’ve decided that either on a Saturday or Sunday of every weekend in the summer, I want to frolic in nature. I chose Garrapata State Park by browsing state park pictures online. So gorgeous, right? It’s a few minutes past Point Lobos on Highway 1. These are my own pictures from Saturday.

Another random thing I found on Pinterest. This is my bus stop – where I catch either the #2 Clement or #3 Jackson from the Financial District going home up Sutter. So pretty!

http://www.scene2.com/our-work/set-building/

Here are some things I’ve found browsing Pinterest.

http://www.flights-of-fab-fashion-fancy.com/

http://sayyestohoboken.com/

http://cupcakesandcashmere.com/

http://myskycastles.blogspot.com/

One more week until I find out whether I’m preggers or whether I can start drinking again. Either way, I’m stoked!

The drugs I’m taking to help me ovulate increase the chance of having multiples (i.e., twins). My dad got really excited when I told him that. Two grandkids for the price of one. Can’t beat that. However, in my mind, having twins is the worst case scenario. Most people tend to say that it’s fine, not to worry, your body will accommodate. Your body can do amazing things.

Let’s do the math. As of this morning, I weighed 87 pounds. Let’s say I had twins each weighing 4 pounds. That’s 8 pounds total which is equivalent to almost 10% of my body weight. Who in the world gives birth to a baby that weighs 10% of her body weight? Not many! I can’t think of anything worse.

Adoption is looking very promising.