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All Posts, Education & Politics

Self Help: Backstory

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2016 will be my year of enlightenment, since 2015 brutally kicked my ass.

After our home flooded in December 2014, we went from living in a 2-bedroom, 2-bath flat to a 1-bedroom, 1-bath. We gave Franco the usable bedroom, while Dean and I slept on two separate couches in the living room and dining room. After we finally recouped the full use of the home, we went through the arduous process of suing the seller (a real estate developer), and coming to an agreement through mediation.

We also moved out of San Francisco, purchasing a new home in my hometown of Alameda. It’s what made sense for Franco and his care, although I was extremely sad to leave the city. The move materially increased my commute, which caused me extreme guilt about the amount of time (or lack of time) I was spending with my son. I spend my pre- and post-work moments seriously running to catch the ferry or BART.

This has resulted in zero time for myself. I don’t exercise. I don’t get pedicures. I don’t see friends. I barely have time to eat. Instead I’ve resorted to the meal replacement drink Soylent that is trending with Silicon Valley engineers so that I can buy back a few more minutes in my day. It’s ridiculous!

A dear friend of mine died very unexpectedly. I became depressed, had a nervous breakdown, and started therapy to help me deal with extreme anxiety.

My only resolution for 2016 is to find time to for myself. Not a mother, wife, relative, friend, or worker. But simply time to breathe, to enjoy the now versus worrying about the past or the future, and just be me. I’ve heard that people teach what they most want to learn. I’ll do my best to be a good teacher.

Let’s get this year started!

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01.04.16

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Comments

  1. Cece

    January 4, 2016 at 1:51 pm

    I hope you get that pedicure and a really nice meal without interruptions soon girl. You are gonna burn yourself out. Hope 2016 will be much better for you!!

    Reply
  2. sonia cheng

    January 4, 2016 at 1:55 pm

    My dear, you are so inspiring! I am sorry you had such a challenging year, especially the loss of your dear friend. I know that although we dont speak on a regular basis, you are always in my heart. Your energy, creativity, voice, and compassion for humanity is just inspiring. I had a challenging year as well in 2015, and i was fortunate enough to do a week long yoga/meditation/pilates/tai chi retreat which was intensive but beautiful and restorative. 2016 is all about renewal and refocusing and making a better balanced life. I will do this via my yoga, meditation and reiki practice. sending you healing thoughts and prayers from europe. lots of love!

    Reply
  3. Tamara

    January 4, 2016 at 2:27 pm

    Here, here.
    I actually had to Google Soylent because I thought you were kidding and making a Soylent Green reference! Wow, I need to get out more.
    My feet are suffering. I look tired. I don’t exercise. I’ve been eating terribly.
    I want my glow and groove back!

    Reply
  4. Janine Huldie

    January 4, 2016 at 3:50 pm

    Love what you have planned for 2016 and am wishing you only the absolute best for all in this new year now, Catherine! 😉

    Reply
  5. Savvy

    January 4, 2016 at 6:33 pm

    What about working from home once a week or reducing your hours? I know what it is like to work too much with no time for myself. Last year, I took a few Fridays off and just relaxed – no fancy vacations. It was heaven.

    My manager finally allowed me to hire a part-time assistant, so I think this year will be better.

    Reply
  6. Patrick Weseman

    January 5, 2016 at 10:38 am

    Blessings to you for 2016.

    Reply
  7. Mo

    January 5, 2016 at 1:54 pm

    Wishing you peace and happiness in 2016 and beyond!

    Reply
  8. Dana

    January 6, 2016 at 12:25 pm

    First, I am so sorry about your friend’s passing. I missed that post but went back to read it – a lovely tribute to GR.

    I think your resolution is perfect. Finding time for yourself will spill over into all other parts of your life, too.

    Reply
  9. Nikki

    January 11, 2016 at 7:02 am

    Wow, girl. You’ve had quite the year! Franco is blessed to have a mom who cares so deeply for him. I wish you a 2016 full of blessings!

    Reply

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Welcome to my site, derived from an advice column I wrote while getting my MBA. I live in the San Francisco Bay Area. I give helpful, opinionated advice based on my own experience and from the expertise of my extensive network. For more, click here.

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