Six years ago, Dean and I met on Friday February 13 at Amelie wine bar in San Francisco, then went out to dinner for Valentine’s the following day, and were engaged within months. We’ve now been married for almost 5 years and have a 9-month-old son. Swear to God, I find it mind-boggling because I thought I was going to remain single forever! I truly thought I’d date casually for the rest of my life, keep on going to Burning Man year after year, and take trips around the world with my girlfriends and gay best friend.
At the time, I had this ‘woe is me’ mentality and cried myself to sleep as if I were the only single person left in the whole universe. If I could go back in time, I would slap that girl silly. I was leading an INCREDIBLE life. I could stay out past last call, sleep in, go wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted. I may not have been partnered up, but I always had a friend to accompany me anywhere. And even if I didn’t, I was perfectly fine sitting at the bar by myself, enjoying a glass of wine. I met lots of guys that way.
My advice to singletons on this contrived day of love: While it is normal to long for a committed relationship, don’t let it get in the way of enjoying the present. Trust that if you were meant to be with someone, that it will happen at the right time.
And in this digital age, how challenging can it be to meet someone…anyone? Back when I was dating, there were only a few sites: Craigslist, Match, eHarmony. Now there’s OkCupid, Tinder, Coffee Meets Bagel, It’s Just Lunch, Tawkify… I’m always curious and amazed to see how many different data apps there are. There’s no excuse.
So what if the dates don’t work out or the relationship ultimately comes to an end? Yes it can be sad and depressing, but there’s something so magical about getting dressed up and going out. Isn’t it nice to flirt and hold hands? I’m still friends with the majority of guys I dated because even if I didn’t end up marrying them, there was still value in those connections! Romance is magical. Seize the moment.