We are still trying to figure things out as first time parents. Sleep-deprived as hell, but completely worth it. To quote the pediatrician, “Francisco is doing tremendous. You two have done a great job.”
It seems so long ago, but I wanted to share the story leading up to Franco’s arrival. Ya ready? It’s a doozy.
I mentioned in my last post that I was working like a madwoman up until I delivered. Dean and I hadn’t gone on a babymoon like most couples do these days, nor were we willing to fly during the pregnancy given the two miscarriages I’d had. So 10 days prior to my delivery date, we decided to tempt fate and spend two nights at the historic Claremont Hotel in Berkeley, which is a 30 minute drive away from the hospital. We even brought our hospital gear…just in case!
I envisioned spa treatments, gourmet meals, soaking in the sun. Here’s a snapshot I took lounging by the pool after we had checked in.
After dinner, we watched The Grand Budapest Hotel at a theater in downtown Berkeley. It was a good movie, but I squirmed my way through it, I felt so uncomfortable. That said, at 38 weeks, I was already leading a very uncomfortable existence, waddling around everywhere and needing to be by a bathroom at all times!
I woke up at 3:30am that night with really bad cramps that got progressively worse. I kept going back and forth between the bed and the toilet, and eventually I passed my mucous plug. We called the advice nurse and explained the situation.
Dean does a parody of the call that goes like this:
Hi this is Catherine Gacad. I’m 38 weeks along and I passed my mucous plug. I have really bad cramps, but I don’t think they’re contractions. Nah, couldn’t be labor. Pain on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the worst? Gosh, I’d say a 2 or a 3. It’s really not that bad. I probably don’t need to go to the hospital. Wait, there’s a baby’s head coming out of my vagina. Do you think maybe now I should go to the hospital?
That wasn’t too far from what happened because when we eventually decided to check out of the hotel, and make our way to the hospital at 7:30am, the medical team said I was already 7 to 8 centimeters dilated.
Dean had temporarily parked in the Emergency Area and said, “Well now that she’s here, I’ll go move the car and come back.”
The nurse quipped, “You’re not going anywhere. This baby is coming out right now!”
They asked if I wanted an epidural, but I was intent on doing the delivery naturally. Another jovial nurse hollered, “Drug-free and a surprise gender baby! I am digging this family!” I laughed, which was the last moment of calm before I descended into the nadir of labor. I screamed bloody murder so loudly so often, it was a warning call to the other women in labor: GET AN EPIDURAL!
I went drug-free without any of the perks of going drug-free. It didn’t matter that I wanted to walk around during labor, I had to be strapped to the bed. For a short while, the nurses let me labor on all fours, I felt better that way. But once the OB walked in, they flipped me around and I was beholden to the hospital way, with the OB wearing her umpire outfit, sitting comfortably in her chair, and preparing to vacuum my baby out. It didn’t matter that I screamed NO CUT! If the OB wanted to cut me or use a vacuum, she was going to do it her way. No discussion.
Dean’s concern, of course, was for the health of the baby and he deferred to the professionals. At least if I’d had a doula present, I would have had someone advocating on my behalf.
My advice? If I had to do it all over again, I’d go drug-free, but have the delivery done by a midwife. With an OB, I’d either hire a doula or get an epidural.
But the most important thing is that I delivered a healthy happy baby. Period. I am obviously working through some bitterness over my labor experience, but I need to realize that for the most part I had a natural, normal delivery.
The baby came out at 8:31am on Mother’s Day. They placed the baby on my chest and Dean smiled, “It’s a boy.”
Congratulations to you and Dean! I’ve been thinking about you knowing that you were due sometime in May. What a fantastic surprise to see this post on the very first night I’m back to checking things out in the blogosphere. I am so, so happy for you and your family! Even though your labor experience was tough, I know that the joy of cuddling with your little Franco makes it all so worthwhile!
Congratulations! I would be too nervous not to know the gender of the baby and not have at least some painkiller! Labor annoyances aside, all that matters is that you were able to celebrate your first Mother’s Day with your healthy, little one. Congratulations again!
I am so happy for you guys and Franco!! It is also cool that you are working through things not going as planned, but that you are seeing that you got the best thing: that beautiful baby.
Huge congrats Catherine once again. I will say I had some issues with my first delivery. At one point, they thought I might need a c-section and I was petrified of being cut open. Not going to lie, I cried like a baby myself at the thought. My husband like yours was more concerned for the health of the baby and kept telling me if they need to do it just let them. In the end, thankfully they didn’t and I delivered her naturally, but still never forget thinking this is my body and I should have some say. Don’t get me wrong, I worried for her safety, too, but still did frustrate me just a bit.
At least it was quick right? I know someone who did the Douala in birthing center all natural. I’m cheap and I am all about doing what will cause less pain so i probably wouldn’t want to spend the money. Like you said the important thing is you got to leave with a healthy baby.
Chuckling here. I met a woman at infant cpr who was sent home because she wasn’t ready, only to deliver in her bathroom shortly after arriving back home. She made the comment “push? Nope didn’t do that, the baby just came out.” Meanwhile I labored for hours and hours, screamed bloody murder because the stupid epidural didn’t work (I could walk around…”we never saw that before” says the nurse) and the doctor tells me to stop screaming because I am scaring everyone else. And that he’s given me enough epidural for a horse. Thank you for sharing that with me. Gotta love our birth stories! The important thing is we have healthy kids, right?! I can’t wait to see more pics! You need to go back to that beautiful hotel at some point so you can really enjoy it! 🙂
Ah, beautiful story – the ending.
Des totally took me by surprise at just over 38 weeks. Scarlet was born on her due date so I was expecting more of the same.
I look forward to hearing more but for now – give the cutie a squeeze from me!
wow! What an amazing story! So happy everyone is happy & healthy.
Oh my goodness, i feel physically so upset for you that the doctor was so horrible but so awesome you still had a healthy happy baby! We also had our first baby this February and similar story – I actually was 10cm dilated when we got to the hospital. Transitioned in the car on the way there – a 40 minute drive. Not fun, don’t recommend it. But had an OB who respected our strong desire for natural birth, and our doula was awesome. Major kudos to you for still pushing through it all and getting that baby out!!! (found you via Casey’s link up 🙂
Whitney @ Journey Mercies
http://www.journey-mercies.com/2014/03/declans-birth-story.html
(my birth story 🙂
Awww, what a great way to celebrate Mother’s Day! So happy for you! I labored for freakin 24 hours and my OB asked me to walked around the mall first when my husband and I first went to the hospital. I could no longer walk straight because I would feel that the baby’s coming out soon. We went to the hospital around 7am and I gave birth at 11:18pm. Whew!
That’s amazing – wow no drugs? You’re a trooper! That is certainly the best Mother’s Day gift for sure and it will be special for more than one reason in your family now. Glad everything turned out OK and that you were able to go through with the no-drugs plan as you intended because sometimes it doesn’t go that route. 🙂 Enjoy motherhood and those little moments as time flies quickly and you’ll blink one day and that baby boy will be 7 like mine! Take Care and get plenty of rest Catherine! -Iva
Catherine, congratulations! To deliver your gorgeous baby boy on Mother’s Day is just perfect.
I didn’t have a great labor experience with my first son either, but my son was healthy and hearty, and that was what really mattered anyway.
I hope you’re loving motherhood!
A huge congrats and to be honest after 18 years with one and almost 17 years with the other one. I still have nor figured out being a parent.
So perfect Catherine!! welcome to team #boymom. The both of you look so great. Happy for you and many many blessings!
I had this whole birthing plan written up and put in my chart. Then my daughter wouldn’t come out and it all went out the window. But as you said, the most important thing was delivering a healthy baby. Thanks for sharing your story!
Oh your little boy is so adorable! You are so blessed to have a healthy little baby!
I’m trying to decide if I want a doula or not. I’m really on the fence. I love my doctor but who knows what goes on during delivery!
I think I’d like to go the natural route with a doula. Of course, I’m nowhere near ready for any of that any time soon 🙂