I’m no psychiatrist, but I think I’m bipolar. Last week, I had a major freak-out over something I took very seriously. I take many things very seriously. The problem is that I don’t think most normal human beings have mild breakdowns over the same things that set me off. Stupid work issues. Stupid volunteer issues. Suddenly I was depressed; I think I still am.
I don’t think I’ve evolved much emotionally from adolescence. The tears I shed over romantic crushes, friendships, even grades back then were just as intense as the tears I shed today. And I have how many years experience and perspective over my teenage self?
I can get very angry, then sobbingly sad, then tipsy in less than an hour. So not normal, right?
At least I can temper the moods by self-medicating. But when one day (out in the future, people!), I get preggers, I can no longer take my Wellbutrin. What will I do? I am going to go ape-shit! That’s what freaks me out the most. And no alcohol to calm me down after a stressful day at work? Oh no no no. That just will not work.