I don’t eat Filipino food. It makes me gag. I think it’s greasy and disgusting. During family functions, there’s only one thing I eat–lumpia. Fresh and fried, small and large lumpia. I usually dunk a generous portion of my aunt’s famous spinach dip into a bowl, then I scoop it up with lumpia. That’s heaven.
When this article came out in the Chronicle on how the time has come for Filipino food to make its way into the culinary hearts of the Bay Area, I couldn’t believe it. The reporter must be getting some kind of kickback.
When Americans need their ethnic fix, there’s a reason why they eat enchiladas, pad thai, and tikka masala. Yeah it’s good, but the first time you tried it, you weren’t disgusted by the description. You’re like, sure I’ll try that. Beans, rice, chicken, salsa, guacamole, and sour cream. Sounds good to me!
But a glance at a Filipino menu will have you running for the closest In-n-Out burger joint.
Here are some things you can find at a Filipino restaurant:
Dinuguan – A special stew made from Diced pork and entrails, simmered in Pork blood, Vinegar, and Spices including Chili peppers. Wuh? Entrails simmered in blood? Ooh yeah.
Binagoongang Baboy – Boneless Pork chunks simmered in Bagoong (shrimp paste). Can they at least hire someone to put a better marketing spin on their descriptions?
Bopis – Pork entrails simmered in vinegar and spices. Can you see what I’ve had to deal with my whole life?
I pulled those descriptions straight out of the Goldilocks website. Goldilocks is the uber-Filipino bakery and food franchise in the U.S. Can you imagine going to a hole in the wall Filipino restaurant in Daly City? I’m telling you, those descriptions will be even worse.
I’d really like to see how this Filipino food resurgence plays out. As for me, I’ll stick to the rainbow rolls at Ryoko’s.