I’m convinced that the perfect hire has the following traits.
Young. Young people are not yet jaded. They’re eager, willing to work hard and long hours. I mean, how many investment bankers do you see who are in their forties? Younglings are the ones who volunteer to spearhead the social events and organize end-of-the-year Christmas packages to families in need. I used to be one of those people back in my early twenties. I used to write out Valentine’s to everyone I worked with and personally sealed it with a Hershey’s kiss. Not any more. I don’t care. I don’t have the time. I figure someone else (usually younger) will pickup the slack.
Single Sans Children. Working parents have to run to daycare to pick Tommy up by 6pm. The single barren can forgo another night at the bar to work late. There are no excuses. Your work might as well be your life so go ahead and impress your boss. The only bedtimes stories are work you brought home to put you to sleep.
Close Proximity to Work. People who live in close proximity to their work are good hires. How many times do you hear coworkers complain, “I gotta go, BART is about to stop running.” Or “I better get going. My commute is an hour long.” Well whose fucking fault is that? It’s ironic that I pay a premium to live in the city of San Francisco and as a result, I also put in more hours. I usually get called in since I’m so close.
No Name Alma Maters. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but people who come from colleges that accept anyone under the sun, tend to work a lot harder than Ivy Leaguers. My theory is that the more recognizable your school, the more you expect to get paid. And if you feel you’re not getting paid enough, well then there’s hell to pay. People I know who barely graduated hick town colleges are so appreciative of the job, they’ll surprise you when it comes to work productivity.
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