I had lunch today with a very sad friend who just broke up with her boyfriend. Here is a pact that her friend sent her. This is a must-read for anyone going through a raw break-up.
I’m so sorry you’re hurting, but please know I’m happy to help you get through this rough time. Here’s your vow/pact should you choose to accept it:
* I will not under any circumstances contact him via phone, text, or email. If I am tempted to do so, I will contact Allie or other friends instead. To avoid any temptation of reaching out to him, I will delete his contact details from my Blackberry. I am allowed to keep his contact details written down but hidden away in a safe-but-not-easily-accessible place for future reference.
* I am aware that any immediate/near-term contact will not resolve any issues or change the situation in any way. I will be better spending my time and efforts moving forward rather than backwards.
* I will not attempt to run into him by purposing walking by his place, making plans in his neighborhood or otherwise spending unnecessary effort to see him in any way.
* I will de-friend him on Facebook so I am not tempted to contact him, look at him, post things for him to notice, or to keep track of what he is doing. If I am in dire need of an update on him, I will contact Allie who will remain connected until I tell her to de-friend him too.
* When I start to worry about him, I will remember that he is a big boy and will cope just fine on his own.
* When I start to miss him, I will remember all the reasons why the relationship did not work.
* I will spend time catching up on rest, seeing friends and enjoying social activities to help me return to the person I am/know best.
* I will remember that I am highly unique and deserve someone very special who truly appreciates all of my wonderful qualities.
* I will remember that I have the great support of friends to help me through this challenging time.