It’s Raining Men

There’s the Burner I’m in love with.  Luckily, for my schedule, he was in DC for the inauguration and has been traveling around the world ever since.  He emailed from Paris.  “I wish you were here.  We would have so much fun together.”  He’s back tomorrow.

There’s my b-school crush in LA who I’ll see at the end of the month.

There’s the father who has a loving relationship with his teenaged daughter.

There’s the guy who moved to California after finding his birth mother.

There’s the Stanford professor.

My matchmaker has set me up with a new match–a Brit with an arrogant personality (from what I can tell on the phone).

My first match who I’ve become good friends with wants me back.  “We were meant to be together.  Let’s start hanging out again romantically.  When can you come over for dinner?”

There’s the national frisbee champion who one set of my friends disliked and another set loved.

There’s the practicing Catholic who goes to church every Sunday like me.  Hallelujah!

A friend of a friend set me up with a former co-worker.  Everything checked out on paper (smart, successful, plays in a band) until I found him on Facebook.  “So Daniel,” I confided in my friend.  “Seems like a nice guy.  We’ve talked a few times on the phone.  Nice, interesting. We had a lot to talk about.  But he’s albino.  I mean, come on…have you ever known someone to have blonde eyebrows?  Blondes are cool.  Blondes are fine.  But blonde eyebrows?”

Our first date–brunch–was good, enjoyable.  We sat outside in the sunshine, didn’t mind the slow service as we chatted about our lives easily.  On the second date–a party with a few friends–it went downhill.  

“What do you think of him?”  I asked each of my friends.

“He’s nice.”

“And?  Anything else?”

“He’s nice.  Period.”  That’s what they both had to say.  

“I KNOW!”  I screamed, exasperated.  “He’s so boring.  He’s laughing at all my jokes like I’m Chris Rock.  I’m not funny!  He’s boring you guys.  He’s boring me.”

“Catherine, then why are you dating him?  Why is he here?”

“I didn’t realize how much I couldn’t stand him until tonight.  We just went out on one brunch date.  I was trying to give him a chance.  You know?  I’m trying to be open-minded.”

So I nixed him.  I felt better.  I’m dating way too many guys and I need to start filtering.  I woke up this morning and wrote everyone’s names in a journal.  I started crossing them out one-by-one.  I can’t be dating ten guys!  Start filtering now!

The filtering exercise was still in my head when I arrived for brunch with a girlfriend.  While enjoying our hash, she sat up quickly and called out, “Mental note.  Mental note!”  She retrieved her Blackberry and started typing away.  “I can’t believe I didn’t think of this sooner. You’d be perfect for a friend of mine from college.  He used to date my Indian friend for years. You’re just his type: cute, smart, engaging.  He’s Polish, Catholic.  This is perfect.  I’ll setup an introduction.”

Great, I mulled.  Exactly what I needed.  Another date.