I sometimes believe I was put on this earth to write about my crappy fucked up life. That way people who read about me can compare it to their own with a sigh of relief, “Thank God that’s not me.” Because I swear if I knew of a blog out there where someone faced miserable date after miserable date, or tragedy after tragedy, I swear I would be glued. Make it the home page.
But no. I don’t have that blogger or person out there to connect with. So I hope I am your home page, or at least bookmarked. The baby steps to getting published.
In this nightmare of a dating life, I do have glimmers of hope. I was reading an interview of Eckhart Tolle yesterday where he said it wasn’t good to hope because hope belies an eagerness for the future. His philosophy is that there is no future. There is no past. There is only the present. But until I have that happy present, there are these glimmers that maybe will one day turning into something happy or permanent.
I’m going to NYC next week for a wedding. I am bringing as my date someone I have never gone on a date with. Strange, huh? We’ve never hooked up, never kissed, never even had a meaningful conversation. He lives in LA. I live in San Francisco. We are going to meet up in NYC for the wedding and spend the weekend together. He booked a hotel room for us. As strange as all that sounds, it seems like a perfectly normal thing to spend a wedding weekend with my business school crush. We’ve had a text relationship for the past year or so.
It will either go splendidly or horribly. Wish me the best. And let’s place our bets.