I enjoyed the member preview to the special Gilbert & George exhibit at the DeYoung—a bunch of zany British artists with sexual, contemporary, weird artwork. I don’t know how to explain it, except that it really wasn’t for me. But even though I really wasn’t turned on by their work, I almost had an orgasm when I realized that the gay duo were actually at the preview and signing autographs beside me. If I had a piece of paper I would’ve offered it to them to sign—even though most people had purchased one of their books to sign. I really would’ve gone up with a napkin if I’d had one, but there wasn’t a single scrap of paper in my big granny bag.
All in all, it was a good weekend. The above exhibit was particularly noteworthy as was my friend’s daughter’s first birthday. That was a blast: good food, entertainment, and lots of arts and crafts for the kids.
But aside from the normal hanging out with family and friends, running errands, and going to church, I realized something about myself this weekend. I have a personality where I tend to take on the mood of those around me—I adapt very easily to the emotions of people I interact with. And so what I realized is that I can’t fucking stand people who are so down on their lives because that means that I’ll just get down on myself. During this weekend, I hung out with a handful of people who were going on and on about how everything totally sucked about their lives. I walked away thinking, “Get your life in order!” I like to bitch, I do. I like to complain just as much as the next person. But I’ll make light of it or I’ll balance it with something positive that’s going on in my life. Otherwise, we might as well all slit our wrists! Someone I know talked about how much she disliked her boyfriend and how even outside of her relationship everything else in her life was just wrong. Then another friend, during lunch waxed on about how much she hated her job, but there wasn’t really much she could do about it. I was praying my phone would ring so I could make an excuse and tell her I had to go! I can’t take it anymore. I want to be a good friend, but I know myself. I will just end up being bitter. So if you find me backing away, flaking on commitments, rescheduling to another time, it’s because I’ve had enough and I’m trying to protect myself. I’m sorry. I have a dark enough personality—so much so that I try to surround myself with positive people. If you can’t make me laugh and inspire me to be good, then I can’t be around your now.
I don’t get tomorrow off so I thought I’d treat myself to dinner and wine, especially since a friend of mine flaked on me. No worries. I’m used to treating myself! But the glass of wine turned into two then three so now I am ready for bed. Enjoy the holiday for all of you who get President’s Day off. Think of Hillary Clinton and how she will make a great next president!