To the guy who continues to call me:
I will not return your call.
I will not change my mind.
I had just had a relaxing time yesterday at the Nob Hill Spa overlooking downtown. A gorgeous, clear day. Then I saw your name on my phone.
I had a fit.
“What a freak! Total stalker. Why do I always get the stalkers?” I cried, I cringed, I cursed aloud.
Then I remembered my Lenten promise. No negative thoughts. So I tried to think positively and put you out of my mind.
How long has it been? A really long time. We went out on one date!
I’m not that smart.
I’m not that cool.
I’m not that pretty.
And I’m mean! I write a blog. Read it. I can be ruthless.
I’m doing the same. For the Chinese New Year, I went into my phone and deleted all those heartfelt text messages from guys I loved.
I’ve had my cell phone for almost five years.
Out went the ‘G’night sweetheart,’ the ‘I miss you, Catherine,’ the ‘I Love You’s.’
Out went the Christmas message from someone I treasured. It made me giggle and smile.
Gone, done, trashed, deleted.
I don’t want to be the modern day Miss Havisham, living in the past.
I learned a lot from my therapist who had said when I was heartbroken, “It just didn’t work out. He’s not some prize to win. It just wasn’t right.”
And that made me feel better.
Please accept that it wasn’t meant to be. You will find someone who is a much better fit for you. I promise.
You said, “You can never have too many friends.” Maybe for you.
But I certainly have way too many friends!!! I’m seeing my best friend on Sunday for the first time in months. Months!
I’m not a great friend to have right now, squeezing time in when I can.
You will find better friends for you, too.