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Etiquette

I’m just about on my way to a cocktail party so I thought I’d blog about how much I dislike it when people show up to parties empty-handed. You don’t go to a kid’s birthday party without a present, right? Well, this is the adult version…don’t show up to a dinner or cocktail party without a bottle of wine or a platter of veggies from Costco. I think it’s rude.

I agree that the person who is hosting should always have enough for their guests to eat and drink, but I just think it’s common courtesy to show a little gratitude for being invited. Another analogy: You don’t go to a wedding without getting a present. In fact, even if you do not attend, you still have to get a present!

Now I had a ‘little’ shindig earlier this month. The shindig turned out to be a bigger party than my place could accommodate so I had to do some guest elimination. I already blogged about that. But given that it was a cheese party and I knew a lot of people would come, I specifically told people to bring wine or cheese. I spelled it out. Still, there are several people who showed up empty-handed. The nerve! I also don’t think it’s very cool to bring one bottle of wine and three guests.

I’ll admit I’ve shown up empty-handed before. If I have, it’s because I didn’t have enough time to get something and getting something would have prohibited me from going at all. In that case, I go straight to the host and apologize for being such a bad guest. The only other reason is to get back at people who’ve come to my place empty-handed.

I know what you’re thinking. You should give because you want to give. “For it is in giving that we receive.” But to me, this really is about common courtesy!

I don’t play favorites even with my closest friends when it comes to stuff like this. I went straight up to one of my friends during my party and asked, “So…no cheese, no wine?”

To which he replied, “I love you too.”

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12.30.07

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Comments

  1. catherine gacad

    December 5, 2013 at 10:50 am

    testing my own comments.

    Reply
    • Catherine

      December 5, 2013 at 10:51 am

      thanks for commenting!

      Reply

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Welcome to my site, derived from an advice column I wrote while getting my MBA. I live in the San Francisco Bay Area. I give helpful, opinionated advice based on my own experience and from the expertise of my extensive network. For more, click here.

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