Testosterone Overload

They’re swarming.

When my date went to the bathroom, a dashing young guy swooped in and charmed me. He showed me the menu and proceeded to comment on his favorite wines. “Feel free to try anything,” he instructed, after his food arrived. I happily helped myself to his appetizer as my date made his way back to the bar.

I sighed. I was sandwiched between my date and a potential future date. I sighed again, then instantly felt empowered. Protocol be damned. I’ll get what I want, when I want it, I don’t care who’s looking. My date and I prepared to leave, but not before I took out my business card, handed it to the cutie next to me and said, “Here’s my business card.”

My date spilled his drink at that moment; I think he was taken aback. The barback came over to help clean up at which point I leaned over and continued, “You should call me sometime.”

Instead of the cutie calling, my date called me the next day and again today which annoyed the hell out of me. It’s fine for me to go against protocol. But fellas, when it comes to dating, stick to the rules. Call once and that’s it. When I’m ready to call you back, you’ll hear from me. If ever.

—–

I recently bought this black wool dress that is so super cute and sexy, I think I’ve worn it every single night since the day I purchased it. No joke. I’m lucky I have different groups of friends to hang out with, otherwise people would see me wearing the same thing every day.

Last night I went out with my co-worker and his wife who organized a pub crawl in my neighborhood. I wore, again, the black dress. With every handshake, I could see desire in the eye of the beholder. I turned in early after they decided to head south of market. I was so close to home there was no reason to join them in a cab to eventually cab back home in another hour.

I woke up to this text message from my friend: ‘The boys are asking where you are…’