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The Anti-Cougar

cou·gar: a female who seeks the pleasure of younger males.

The term came into my vocabulary a year ago when my friend started dating a younger guy. Her cub got a hold of her laptop, brought up the website urbancougar.com, and made sure it was displayed for her next time she logged on. Bad move on his part, but at least he was knowledge-sharing. I’d never heard of ‘cougar’ before their tiff.

Had his ploy not occurred, I’m not sure I ever would have encountered the term. What’s the antonym for cougar? That would be me. I gravitate towards older men; I always have.

I refuse to date younger men. We all have our own set of criteria. I rarely make exceptions when it comes to age. I cringe even when I’m dating someone my own age. This is what I think of:
1. Immature.
2. I’m paying for half the bill.
3. He has roommates.
4. He’s intimidated by me.
5. Insecure.
6. Not ready to settle down.

Stereotypes, sure. But I can’t help but surmise.

I like older men, and when I say ‘older’ men…I mean in the Hugh Hefner sense. Rich, powerful, confident. Think what you want. I won’t apologize for wanting to date someone who grabs the bill (Hallelujah Praise the Lord) and whisks me away on holiday (that hasn’t happened yet, but I’ll keep praying).

Although I’m not looking for someone as old as Hef, wrinkly skeleton-like and propped up by his three girlfriends, I do like a man about ten years my senior. Here’s what I think of:
1. Finally, a dinner I don’t have to pay for.
2. “I have a second home in Carmel.”
3. Knows what he wants.
4. Knows what he doesn’t want.
5. Ready to settle down.
6. Experienced—having seen enough highs and lows to be ultra content with life at that very moment.

31 year old Playmate seeks older Playman for long-term relationship.

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02.25.07

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Welcome to my site, derived from an advice column I wrote while getting my MBA. I live in the San Francisco Bay Area. I give helpful, opinionated advice based on my own experience and from the expertise of my extensive network. For more, click here.

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