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Drunk Texts

What up VIXEN?
From: Fraser
10:01pm 11/18/06

Hi. Are you in LA or here?
From: Catherine
10:04pm

Vegas. Ted says hi.
From: Fraser
10:05pm

Don’t gamble all your bonus away. Probabilities are better with credit card roulette. Try it when you guys get the hotel bill.
From: Catherine
10:07pm

Hot….what r u wearing? I’m drunk so I can ask.
From: Fraser
10:09pm

A turtleneck. It’s chilly here. But no underwear.
From: Catherine
10:12pm

Shave, trim wax? I NEED TO KNOW!
From: Fraser
10:13pm

Wax. Pain is good.
From: Catherine
10:14pm

Lil masochist….hmmm…i like it. 😉
From: Fraser
10:16pm

——————-

Couple guy friends from b-school. I published my own list of the ten hottest guys in school and Fraser was one of them. Red headed and red HOT.

In Vegas and drunk at 10pm? How silly! The text conversation made me laugh. Not as good as a phone call, but I’ll take it.

I’ve noticed that guys are really into text messaging…A LOT. I’m a slow texter, plus I’d rather make a phone call. Don’t get me wrong, I love email…but texting is a lot different. It takes a long time to punch those messages. Texting is useful when you’re in a loud bar or club, but come on fellas….ENOUGH ALREADY!

I dated someone who always texted, never called (ok, maybe once or twice but only after I told him to CALL ME). One night over drinks I brought it up. “Why do you insist on texting? Why can’t you just call me so we can have a normal conversation on the phone?”

“Catherine, I’m not a phone person, alright? I just don’t like talking on the phone.”

“That’s ludicrous. So we’re supposed to get to know each other over text messages?”

He repeated his answer about not being a phone person. Then I realized why he was still single and doing the online dating thing even though he was 1) HOT, 2) successful, 3) talented, 4) funny. He had communication problems and relationships are all about communication! I vaguely recall him mentioning something about not being in a real relationship.

I know I have problems, but at least I can pick up the phone and talk about it.

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11.19.06

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Comments

  1. Anonymous

    November 20, 2006 at 10:47 am

    I think texts are a substandard method of communication. Impersonal, rife with grammar and spelling errors, they are just about the lowest form of communication we have…Even a telegram has some nostalgic romance to it.
    I told Shaheen this and she disagreees although she does like a guy to call her. She is a copious texter. When I went to visit, she was constantly texting.
    I mentioned that if someone invites me somewhere via a text, I view it is a slight. They couldn’t be bothered to take an extra 5 minutes to call me and invite me? I’ve gotten mass text invites before. How crass.

    Reply
  2. Anonymous

    November 20, 2006 at 12:50 pm

    It’s just another form of technology we have to get used to. To paraphrase what Miss Manners once wrote, people used to get so upset when answering machines first came out; it was so impersonal. Then, years later, people would get upset when people didn’t have them!

    So this guy prefers to text, while you prefer to talk. If doesn’t mean either one of you is better than the other. However, if neither one of you is capable of flexing your communication style to accomodate the other’s, then clearly you weren’t meant to be. You may be a loquacious conversationalist, but it takes two to tango.

    As to getting upset over a mass invitation, would you have felt better not being invited at all?

    Come on people, just try to put yourselves in the other person’s shoes for once.

    Reply
  3. Anonymous

    November 20, 2006 at 1:15 pm

    I don’t mean to sound as harsh or as dogmatic as I’m coming across. I neglected to mention that texts often come late or not at all. Sketchy delivery = sketchy method of communication. One such text was an invite to a friend’s birthday gathering. Having not ever recieved it, I did not attend. She felt hurt (deservedly so) that I did not attend. I blame the text, the TEXT!

    User error? Perhaps. Yet have we become so busy in our lives that a simple phone call has gone by the wayside? Texts have their place, as do emails, letters, faxes, blogs, webcams and telepathy. I suppose we are just figuring out where they all fit in.

    Reply

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Welcome to my site, derived from an advice column I wrote while getting my MBA. I live in the San Francisco Bay Area. I give helpful, opinionated advice based on my own experience and from the expertise of my extensive network. For more, click here.

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