I don’t want to be that girl who lives her life hoping she’ll find someone. I know I’m far from it since two people within the past few weeks told me they didn’t think I’d ever get married–one of whom is my own mother! “It’s ok, Cat. You’re so demanding and hard-headed. Naaah, marriage isn’t for you.” Thanks Mom for the vote of confidence.
I told my friend that I didn’t care whether or not I got married. I wasn’t concerned. At least I was confident that I would never be alone. Maybe I won’t get married, but I’ll always have a partner. I’m pretty sure of it. Her response? “Ohhh, that’s so sad!!!”
Wuh? I had told her that I envisioned being partnered with someone in my future, that I was fine with that, and she practically insisted that marriage is the key to happiness. Bahumbug.
Right now I’m dealing with the 30+ bahumbug girlfriends fretting about not being married. One of my friends who had just gotten into an argument with her boyfriend (she didn’t think he was treating her well) called me crying one night about it. Sob, sob. But she managed to cough out, “I know one thing, though. I never want to be alone.” THIS IS AFTER SHE HAD JUST FINISHED TELLING ME HER BOYFRIEND WAS TREATING HER LIKE SHIT. I almost hung up the phone, I was so disgusted with her.
The majority of my gal-pal conversations involve dating, boyfriends, marriage…which is fine. But to be obsessed about it, freaked out about it. “How’s the dating scene in San Francisco? Do you think it’s better than New York? Do you think I should move out there?”
“Uhhh, I’d base my decision on what the city offers, how cool the art scene is, the outdoor activities, job opportunities. Not on what my chances are of finding someone.” More disgust. All this talk of men is so oppressive. Free yourselves.
I admit I contribute to the mindset. I mean, my blog started out with me describing my dating adventures. More people commented when I wrote those postings than they ever do now. Romance and sex is interesting. Everything else is…still interesting. I’ll make it so!
Man or no man. Women, go out there and live your lives!