I swear I wasn’t going to go.  I wanted a break after all the wedding planning this year.  The only reason I went is because I saw a rendering of this piece called Minaret by my all-time favorite artist Bryan Tedrick.  I am in love with the guy.  I was practically stalking him at the party celebrating the Honorarium artists.

The first night we got there, we walked over to this amazing art installation and there was the artist watching people climb his work.  ”OMIGOD, Bryan Tedrick,” I screamed.  ”You’re the reason I came to Burning Man!  I wasn’t going to come, but I knew this was going to be so amazing!  I had to be here!”  I’m pretty sure I freaked him out.

I did scale up 50 feet to the domed top.  The upward trek was very challenging and scary.  I actually went 15 feet up, then made my way back down because the hooks where you should be placing your hands aren’t easily apparent.  After I went back down and sulked, someone on the Burning Man staff promised to be my spotter.  So, yes, I made it safely to the top!

Here I am posing absolutely star-struck with my favorite artist.

Here’s one of the most popular art installations that came out this year by Marco Cochrane.  It had everyone buzzing. “Have you seen Bliss?”  ”You gotta go checkout Bliss.” This is what makes Burning Man so special–at least for me. You’re not going to see such amazing work concentrated within a mile diameter.

I pulled this description from the Burning Man website.

Bliss Dance is a unique steel sculpture utilizing cutting edge design; an unabashedly breathtaking modern sculpture in structure and balance. She celebrates humanity and shows the feminine beauty, power and strength that emerges when women are safe and free to be themselves. Standing 40 feet tall, she is dancing naked with her eyes closed; a sign that the spirit of the community is healthy and the balance between male and female is present.

Here’s a picture of her backside at night.

We arrived Friday evening a few days before Burning Man officially starts. As you can see from this picture, there are a lot of trucks and heavy machinery for the installations surrounding the man.  Artists are working hard to complete their work.

I woke up Saturday morning to take these pictures of the landscape. The weather was surprisingly cool. So cool that I walked all over the playa instead of riding a bike.  I’d never experienced it so cool during the day in my nine years of attending.

Back from the desert and now in the Hamptons.

Here’s a summary in pictures of my short, but wonderful trip to Burning Man.

Maser and I made one last stop at the Keystone Reno exit for Kentucky Fried Chicken to bring to the playa.  Because seriously, who doesn’t LOVE fast food?  The two of us brought a total of four whopping buckets.  Here’s Maser with his two.

I try to make a point to bring Costco pizza or Popeye’s to parties.  I swear it’s the first thing to go.  Wine is so boring.  Why not spice it up?

I’m out, people.  One last shower then it’s off to the playa with crazy Maser.

Thunderstorms are forecasted for this weekend.  If it rains, that’ll be the first in my nine years of going.  Fun!

Super excited.  Will try to absorb as much art as possible in the little time that I’m there.  Wish I could blog and tweet from the desert, but it’ll have to wait until I’m in New York.

Damn, my life sucks!

I’m on vacation!  I’ll be out for two weeks and when I come back, I’ll still have another three weeks of vacation left for the year. Let’s travel, people!

I started the day with a chocolate chip cookie, peanut butter cookie, and a chocolate peanut butter bar from Baker and Banker.  I couldn’t pick just one.

Then decided on a whim to check out Red Door Cafe which is hands-down a tiny little gem of a restaurant. Everyone in the joint, who’d been waiting outside since 9:30am, were locals trying to get a whiff of the action.  Finally we prevailed.  Well worth it.  The food was light–not overwhelming, tasty–not salty, fresh–hand-picked from the garden.  Damn!  Love this place.

We had a little conversation going on our side of the cafe.  We agreed without a doubt–best breakfast fare in the city.

I don’t know if anyone noticed, but I stopped wearing my engagement ring.  I just got annoyed by it. Even after they resized it and inserted bumps at the bottom, it would hang by the side of my finger.  I took it off at work because it bothered me while I was typing. Sometimes I would accidentally leave it at work—not a good thing!  So I just stopped wearing it.

Well I went to a jeweler who specializes in custom jewelry. He’s the same guy who replicated a rose gold band with diamonds that I’d found on the Neiman Marcus site.  No problem, he said, and he did it for a third of the price on the site.

I went back to him last week and asked if he could reset my engagement ring in rose gold to match my wedding band.  ”Dahling, you know I’m not resetting your ring.  I must redo the ring from scratch.  Aye.  You should have come to me to begin with.”

My engagement ring was out of the box from Derco Jewelers.  They resized it and resized it until they could no longer do anything to it–at least that’s what they told me. It fits fine, they insisted.  Any more resizing and it won’t fit your finger anymore.

Point is, there’s only so much you can do to resize a ring to my toddler-sized fingers. I needed a new one that was made to fit me. And now it does.  Very happy.  I ain’t taking this thing off.

Having trouble with my macro setting on my camera.  Either that or I suck taking pictures.  Anyhow, this is the best I could do.

I know plenty of mothers–friends, family, coworkers.  A ton of moms in my network.  I think they’re great.  They’re attentive.  They’re all good cooks.  They’re the glue that holds the household together.

But there’s someone special that I had the privilege of watching in action last weekend in Newport Beach.  She was so amazing; I’ve never seen anyone like her.  Never.

She’s got three boys–a five-year-old and a set of 3-year-old twins.  By the time we met up, she’d already spent the whole day with them playing on the beach.  Still, she continued to chase after them, soothe them when they were crying, play hide and go seek.  Not once did she complain.  Never did she lose her cool.  She always considered their best interests.  She was just a ton of fun.  Her older son told me, “My mommy’s the best.  She is.  She’s the best.”

At the end of the night, when the rest of us adults were about to collapse from exhaustion (exhaustion from eating and drinking at a wedding), she perked up.  ”I’m going to tell the waitress it’s the twins’ birthday.  Then they can blow out the candles and we’ll take pictures!”

The rest of us complained.  Can’t we get the bill and get out of here already?

She snuffed at her husband, “Why do you have to be such a downer?”

Next thing you know, she’s leading the charge singing happy birthday while cradling one of the kids in her arm because he’d had a meltdown.  With her other arm, she’s spoonfeeding hot fudge sundae to another son.  On top of that, she’s asking me questions because she wants to get to know me.  Un-friggin-real.

I couldn’t be that kind of mother.  In general, I’m not a high-energy person.  There isn’t anything I like more than sitting lazily on the couch with my face in a book.  Sorry to my future kid.  I’ll do my best to find you a super nanny.

I love Dancing with the Stars, but whether or not I watch completely depends on who’s on. So here’s my lineup!

The Situation – I hear he’s already locked and loaded for the show.  I’m addicted to Jersey Shore because of this guy.  I think he’s the best reality TV personality we’ve ever had. He’s witty, funny, and those abs…dreamy!

Ali & Roberto – I’ve never rooted so much for a couple in all my years of watching the Bachelor/Bachelorette franchise.  I don’t want to see them dance together as a couple, but competing against each other will be good TV.

Jesse James – The most hated man in America.  An opportunity to redeem himself with his winning personality?  Maybe!

Elin Nordegren – Not that she would ever grace the show with her presence, but she’d get major sympathy points, right?

Khloe Kardashian – The ugly one who’s always in the shadow of her prettier sisters.  She’d get the tranny vote for sure.

Landon Donovan – Here’s my one sports figure in the lineup.  Like all the other athletes on the show, he’d get to the finals.

Brian Austin Green – The show seems to love the 90210 alumni (Shannen Doherty, Ian Ziering, Jennie Garth).  Brian triumphed in finding a wife, he could use this as a jump-start to his career.

Ashley or Mary Kate Olsen – There’s always some dumb supermodel who gets voted off early on.  One of these two would do.

Mark Zuckerberg – Here’s my one successful business man / entrepreneur.  Especially with the Facebook movie which apparently is complete fiction, this could be his chance to show everyone his true colors.

Betty White – You gotta have Betty White!  We won’t have this amazing woman much longer, so get her on the show STAT.

I hear the official lineup will be announced on Monday during or after the Bachelor Pad.  I’ll be on the playa, running around trying to absorb as much art as possible.  But this will be the first thing I google as I approach Reno.

I just saw the most disturbing thing.  The loser who used to cheat off of me in freshman year algebra indicates on his LinkedIn profile that he graduated Cum Laude from Cal.  BULL FUCKING SHIT.  I so want to call that asshole out on his self-promoting antics.

It gives me much delight to learn that it took him more than a decade after me to finally get his Bachelor’s degree.  He finished in 2006 when we graduated high school in 1993.  Way to work hard, buddy!

It pains me to know that he got accepted into my very competitive school–probably a junior college transfer.  But to graduate Cum Laude?!  I have got to see that transcript. Moreover, I would bet serious cash that he is living in a make believe world.

I worked my little buttocks off and I barely made honors.  And I’m a smart cookie.  I’m no dunce who needed to cheat off of people.

Cum Laude my fucking ass.  Let’s see that transcript, loser.