Maybe I can write more from the playa?!?!
I’ve had a handful of Brazilians by now. Definitely less than 5. They’re no less painful each time. But I’m so cheap, I’ve always gotten them at cheapy nail salons. The last time I found the highest rated woman on Yelp only to get three patches of skin ripped off my cooch. If I hadn’t left on a plane the next day, I would have high-tailed it to her salon to give her a verbal lashing. She was lucky.
“Do you not like me?”
It wasn’t about me and why I want to be the Bachelorette. I get it. I’m a business woman. My presentation touched on this Nerdy Cheerleader theme and how if they selected me, I would make sure that every attendee felt welcome and felt like they were getting attention. I offered to write personal emails that night to each guy which would further incent me to get to know them on a personal level. Also, it would help with brand recognition by emphasizing, “Thank you for coming to tonight’s Linx Bachelorette event.”
When I fell into my depressed state earlier in the week, everything started to spiral out of control. My body was out of wack. I wasn’t hungry. Me—someone who can’t go more than a few hours without eating. I don’t lose weight nor do I gain weight. I always stay within a two pound range, but I started to lose weight rapidly. I got down to my high school weight. I couldn’t sleep even with Ambien. I woke up intermittently throughout the night, sometimes jolting out of bed, crying out, “Why does shit like this always happen to me?” I couldn’t focus at all. I stared at analyst reports at work with eyes glazed over. I wasn’t really reading anything. I just stared and zoned into the tables. My head was in the clouds. I couldn’t wait to get home so I could sulk alone without people whizzing by my desk. I thought about taking a day or two off, but I knew that would only make things worse. I saw myself in bed, drugged out on a couple pills of Ambien, trying to sleep the pain away. At least in the office, I could pretend to be ok. I could answer questions, make a few phone calls, check the stock price…do something. At least I was doing something.